Awwww!  Thanks anon!  

Pictures from Fallcon 2014!  Got to have a table with my wifey, as always, where we had our books and crafts and things.  The art behind us belongs to Rainarc, who is the cover artist to our book, “Seeking the Storyteller,” we were table mates so we combined our powers :)

Had a really good time meeting some great cosplayers and fans of my work. I’m still getting used to having fans, but it’s so great meeting everyone <3 Thanks for all of the support you show us!

Hey Aesha!  I would’ve pronounced your name wrong, too, lol.  Anyhow, this may be a long answer, but I get wordy and stuff, so here we go!

Here’s the thing about confidence: it takes time.  It’s something you constantly work at.  I’m 31 years old and have had years of working on my confidence.  I grew up in the 80s.  I grew up in a time where there weren’t that many conventions, cosplay wasn’t as huge as it is now, anime was still new and video games were still growing.  Being a geek was just not cool, and not “common” with black girls — so I was told.  I somehow wasn’t “acting black” because I was into dragon balls and doing fatalities in Mortal Kombat.  This is still a thing that happens sometimes, but it wasn’t nearly as big of a deal as it was when I was growing up.  

So when I see it happen now I’m like, “This is so old.”  I think bullies think they’re coming in with new material.  The reality is, they’re not.  Bullying is as old as time, you know?  Calling someone fat?  Thanks for the info, I already know what I look like.  ”That person isn’t black.”  Really?  I could’ve sworn when I stared at the picture for reference her skin color changed.  When I got bashed for my cosplay I had this moment of, “… really?” It kind of baffled me.  Not because of the bullying itself, but the fact that it happened within the geek community.  Growing up, the people who picked on geeks weren’t other geeks, it was the people outside the circle, the ones who didn’t get what made Saturday morning anime on Sci-Fi so great.  It certainly wasn’t the geeky kid sitting next to me during lunch.  So now my mind is like, “You have got to be kidding,” because… really?  We’re all geeks, why are we bashing each other?

I also grew up with some pretty confident women around me.  That whole black, independent woman thing was huge (still is).  Someone talk shit about you?  Fuck them.  Someone hurt you?  Set fire to their car. Someone hit you?  Hit them back.  Harder.  Stab them.  Something. Don’t take that shit lying down.  I’m being serious, black women were (and still are) expected to be no nonsense sassy superstars.  Someone told you you were fat?  Whatever, you just can’t handle all this.  And it’s not a bad mentality to have, but there’s something really important that I think people should admit to when it comes to confidence: it’s not something we have 24/7.  

I know a lot of people talk about body positivity and confidence, which is fantastic, but something else to talk about is the fact that you’re not going to feel great all the time. Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, has a bad day.  That’s something really important to realize and why I really love it when people come out and say that.  I love when these big names in the community open up like, “I didn’t always feel like I could take on the world.”  Because it’s true.  Insecurity isn’t exclusive to the chunky kid, or the black kid, or the gay kid, it happens to everyone, for different reasons.  And even if you’re the most confident, black, female, fat, lesbian out there, sometimes you wake up feeling like crap.  And that’s o.k.  Sometimes the insecure fat kid in me wants to hide in a sweater. Sometimes the insecure little girl stands and watches the boys play video games and she wonders if she’s weird for wanting to play, too. Sometimes the black girl wonders if she’s good enough. Sometimes the lesbian questions if she should hold her wifey’s hand in certain areas they visit.  It happens.  It happens to everyone, and that’s normal.  

Everyone has that doubtful voice in their head that tries to tell them that something is a bad idea.  For instance, when my wifey said she could make Wonder Woman for me, I was really excited, but I also had this moment of, “Am I really about to cosplay this?  She’s an icon.  She’s not black, she’s not fat, she’s beautiful.  Am I really about to do this?”  But my wifey, as always, was by my side and that dress is one of my favorite things to cosplay.  But that doesn’t mean I wasn’t intimidated at first.  When you hear that insecure voice, address it, talk about it, tell someone, “I don’t know,” and talk about it.  Don’t let it fester, you know?  When I started to feel unsure I was like, “Oh man wifey, I dunno…” and she was like, “You’re going to be beautiful in this, I promise.”  And you wanna know something funny? The day I posted that picture for the first time on my cosplay page, I did get bashed!  Someone made a comment about how I looked like I was eating myself to death!  But you know what?  I felt so good in that dress and felt so gorgeous that confident Brichibi was there in an instant like, “Oh please.”

Comfort is also hugely important.  Confidence is great, but it’s also important that you feel comfortable in what you’re wearing, and that adds to that confidence.  I love that Wonder Woman dress and feel good it in.  I did my own take on her, one that I would feel comfortable wearing and one that I thought would look good on me.  Find things that make you feel good.  

It’s all a process, really, and it’s not a race.  Take your time.  Just because you see a plus sized woman working her curves doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong if you’re not ready to do that yet.  Take as long as you need.  Try new things out.  Have fun with it.  Find groups that are body positive and share a picture.  Start with a selfie and work your way up.  Do something cute with your hair.  Wear some new eyeshadow.  Do what makes you feel good, that’s what this is all about: you feeling good about yourself.

If you can’t see yourself stepping out of sweats, work those sweats! Sporty looks are cute!  Get some cute tennis shoes to match.  And smile.  A smile goes a long way.  Then work your way up, get some cute jeans, maybe a skirt that reaches your ankles.  Have fun with your wardrobe, have fun in the things that make you feel comfortable.  And as far as cosplay goes, don’t be afraid to alter an outfit into something you want to wear.  That’s what I did with Wonder Woman, and it’s fun coming up with new styles and interpretations to characters.    

I hope this helps <3

fabulousfuckyou:

angeldictator:

naughtynightowlinthesexysexlair:

angeldictator:

Beast Boy Progress!

This is exactly how I’ve always imagined Beast Boy looked like in real life.

!!! oh my goshh thank youu so much ;u;

scREAMS IM IN LOVE WITH YOU

Holy wow!

linefaced:

Yayyy

Cuties!

grrspit:

ipomoeaj:

jean-luc-gohard:

the-goddamazon:

We know why.

Don’t forget Charlie Sheen. He’s been arrested for domestic violence at least six times and shot a woman. With a gun. And he’s still got a career.

Sean Penn tied Madonna to a chair and beat her. Fuck him. Fuck all of them.

Michael Fassbender

Matthew Fox

John Lennon

Paul McCartney

Ringo too I’m pretty sure

Phil Spector, although he’s now in jail for killing a lady he beat on Ronnie Spector for years and still got into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame

Axl Rose

Vince Neil

Sean Penn

Charlie Sheen

Jim Morrison tried to set fire to his girlfriend

Stephen Segal

Tommy Lee

Ozzy Osbourne

Mickey Rourke

Bill Murray

Gary Busey

Tom Sizemore

Christian Slater

James Caan

Josh Brolin

Edward Furlong

I could go on.

The point isn’t that the men on the left don’t deserve everything bad they have coming to them.  The point is where the fuck is all the outrage when the men on the right do it.  So many of our pop culture heroes are abusers and nobody seems to care.

Like, even if we’re gonna stick to the NFL, Ben Roethlisberger patiently sat out his six game suspension for rape and continued on with his career with little outrage. 

If we’re really going to care now about ostracizing perpetrators of domestic violence, we got a lotta slack to pick up.

Reblogging for this last part.

iridessence:

blackchaii:

Look at her tho„

She gets it.

Yep.  

naturee-feels:

Your not any less of a black girl if you don’t have a booty.

Your not any less of a black girl if you can’t dance.

Your not any less of a black girl if you don’t have any curves.

I find a lot of black girls feeling complacent if they do not have these certain attributes, that almost seem synonyms to Black Women. Your blackness is not and should not be defined by this.

I also see a lot of people, black or non black, who help perpetrate these stereotypes and it needs to end.

You’re not any less of a black girl if you play video games.

You’re not any less of a black girl if you watch anime.

You’re not any less of a black girl if you read comics.

You’re not any less of a black girl if you watch sci-fi.

You’re not any less of a black girl if you don’t use slang.

You’re not any less of a black girl if you don’t listen to hip hop.

You’re not any less of a black girl if you’re not sassy.

You’re not any less of a black girl if you cry.

The only thing that makes you a black girl is the color of your skin, not the things you do in your life.