I’ve been in the cosplay community for about a year now and while the idea of cosplaying and putting costumes together is great, you know what’s not so great?
The RIDICULOUS amount of bullying.
The fact that there are cosplay groups MADE for people to trash other cosplayers/photographers.
The massive rape culture that takes place at conventions, including sexual harassment.
The racism within the community, including cultural appropriation.
The slut shaming within the community.
The fact that victims have to suffer in silence because they’re worried that police won’t take it seriously.I keep hearing horrific story after horrific story from people talking about what was done to them - shit that is criminal. And they put up with it because they don’t think anyone can help them or that anyone will care.
I have, myself, been stalked for the past year by a “famous” cosplayer, who’s actually tried to show up at photo shoots I’m at before and sent me threats. Another cosplayer messaging photographers I work with in an effort to try to ruin my modeling career, or trying to isolate me from my friends and support systems. This stuff is FUCKED UP. It’s ABUSIVE. And the really fucked up part is how scared I’ve been to talk about it for fear that no one would take it seriously because “it’s just cosplay.”
The fact that my story IS NOT UNIQUE IS FUCKED UP.
I’m shaking as I write this because I know the second I post it that I’ll get some form of retaliation from one of my bullies, whether it be another threat or more photographers getting messages about me being an ass or more rumors being spread (for those of you who heard I’m a cr*zy d*ke - that ones kinda true. The one about me hating people with mental illnesses? Not so much.) But I have too many friends who have resigned to being miserable, having horrible anxiety, and feeling powerless in their life because they feel like they can’t say anything.
It needs to stop. And I’m done staying quiet about it.
So what I want to say to both of my bullies:
ENOUGH. Stop checking my pages, stop keeping tabs on me, stop trying to isolate me, stop trying to figure out where I’m going to be and showing up there. Just walk away. I am NOT a threat to you. I just want to dress up as fictional characters in peace for fucks sake.
To people who are suffering from cosplay bullies:
YOU ARE NOT ALONE AND IT IS TIME TO SPEAK. These people do not stop until you stand up for yourself. Forget the “forgiveness” and “turn the other cheek” bullshit. Silence is giving your tacit approval of what’s happening to you, and it’s not going to stop until you say something. Keep records and screenshots of everything that has happened, and don’t just sit and wallow. There are people that support and love you but they will never know they you need their support and love until you say something.
It’s NOT “just cosplay.” This is real life.
The bullying needs to stop NOW.
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