castielcampbell:

deanisanactualprincess:

icoulduseinsouciantmaybe:

superhubbys:

its gotten to the point where i have to pretend nudity surprises me

 #OH NO GENITALS WHAT A DISASTER

A+ gif use

This actually happened like, my mom came to visit me when my book came out and again on my birthday.  I have no idea what we were talking about but somehow it turned into sex and relationships and things… because my mom is a dirty old lady.  And I don’t know what she said to me but it triggered this:

Me:  I have someone who I regularly have sex with

And like I have no idea what she said to make me say that!  And I had this moment of, “Crap did I just say that to my mom?!”  Like aren’t I supposed to be all, “Gasp what is sex I have no idea?!”  But her response was:

Mom:  I know that’s right!

And this was said with all the black woman sass in the world.  So then I kinda got over trying to act all innocent around my mom.

But again she’s a dirty old lady sooooo yeeeeeah.  I mean she read my book and loved it then read my short story and loved it and was like, “Gurl you so nasty,” because the short story was all gay sex and she was like, “But that guy was HOT too bad he was gay or I could’ve had him,” and like… yeah that’s my mom.

However around my dad I am forever innocent like, “Gasp a naked person oh my how crude!  Fornication is terrible!”