What if Cecil is just a regular late night radio host in a normal small town who’s bored and knows nobody really listens to the show from like 11pm-3am so he just makes up quasi-horror stories about the town and his neighbors and stuff
and Carlos has been his boyfriend since day 1 but has been abroad doing research for some time and finally came home, so naturally Cecil makes a big deal about it on his show (Carlos just fondly rolls his eyes at the whole thing)
what Cecil doesn’t know is how his show has suddenly become very popular through word of mouth and a good portion of the town stays up to listen to at least some of it and they’re always secretly pleased to hear themselves mentioned (even Steve Carlsberg), but they try to keep it on the DL so Cecil doesn’t realize his popularity and keeps the show as is
Also, Carlos knows that the town knows and keeps it from his boyfriend, because he’s amused by the things Cecil says about him, and he likes being “that cool radio guy’s boyfriend.” And bathroom cat is just Carlos’ pet cat who is quite normal, but Cecil has never had a pet so he comes up with bizarre things to say (and while Carlos was away he had to figure out cat logic, maybe he’s been a dog person all his life so he finds it weird when the cat doesn’t come when he calls its name, or how he can’t rub it’s tummy, ect). And! The pizza place is just a mom and pop place that Cecil likes, but the town is overrun by the likes of Pizza Hut and Dominos, so Cecil wants to support the local shop.