When Persona 4 was released, I thought it’d just be a by-the-numbers follow up to Persona 3, which was, admittedly, not a bad thing at all. I loved Persona 3. But what I didn’t expect was that there’d be a character who I’d be able to relate to more than any character in any other media.
Kanji Tatsumi.
Now, a disclaimer: I’m a straight guy. I have no sexual attraction to men. And even while popular interpretation of Kanji’s development was that he was a gay man who was forced into a straight role I saw a much deeper and more nuanced characterization to his personality that went beyond sexuality and offered insight to a damaged individual.
When he’s first introduced he’s basically depicted as a man’s man, a guy more likely to knock your block off than to give you a compliment on how you look. He’s mistaken as a punk biker who’s been messing things up and generally made neighborhoods a less nice place to live.
Later on, however, we discover he’s actually kind of a momma’s boy. He beat the crap out of those bikers because they were disturbing his really kind mother. He’s a family oriented kind of guy, totally the opposite of the badass persona we’ve been told he carries. He does stuff not because he’s a jerk looking for a fight, but because he’s a good son who genuinely cares about his mother’s well being.
What a sissy, right?
Well, that’s exactly the problem. The front he puts out is one of confidence and manliness, a personality who could give fuck all what others think of him, who does what he wants, when he wants, and dares the consequences of his actions to catch up with him. This is an attitude many men (myself included) are pressured to act like - we’re told we need to be strong, be tough, be stoic, never to show weakness, never to love our mothers, never to show emotion. The truth is much less pretty.
"So arrogant and self-centered! They cry if you get angry, they gossip behind your back, they spread nasty lies…
They look at me like some… some disgusting THING and say that I’m a weirdo…Laughing at me, all the while!
"You like to sew? What a queer!"
"Painting is so not you."
"But you’re a guy…"
"You don’t act like a guy…"
"Why aren’t you manly…"
…
Men are much better…
They’d never say those awful, degrading things. Yes, I vastly prefer men…”
From a young age Kanji has been told by girls that he needed to act this way or that, and if he didn’t he was a queer, or a sissy, or NOT A MAN, whereas he ostensibly never received any of these kinds of demeaning statements from his guy friends. This causes him to be confused - he could be straight, or gay, or bisexual, but his interactions with women and men have caused him to question the people he really wants to be around. Now of course, this issue is simplified loads - in real life there are many multifaceted reasons and problems why something like this is a problem, from societal pressures to peer pressure to parental pressure.
Yet, Kanji’s experiences are not too different from many modern men who have been victimized by women for not being what they “should be.” Modern representation of what an ideal man is - strong, tough, rich, etc. and if they fall short of those expectations they are not a man. Having had many of this type of experience with girls where I’m told I’m a loser because I liked anime or cartoons (which I did, but I also liked tons of other things), or I’m a queer because I liked “playing dress up” (cosplay), or I’m undesirable because I’m not big and strong (I’m 5’8” and lean), or I’m a failure because I’m not rich (which is true, I live within my means). Guy friends on the other hand, have widely and almost universally accepted me for who I was. I was a 5’8” Asian guy who was great to hang out and drink with, who had some quirks but no more than any other person, and who had some insecurities but didn’t let them get bloated out of control. And often I’d wonder, “why can’t my female friends be like my guy friends? Why can’t they accept me for who I am instead of shaming me? Why don’t they judge me for being who I am instead of for not being who they want?”
And you really don’t have to be gay, or straight, or bi, or whatever to relate to what Kanji has gone through - because while he finds friends - both guys and girls - who accept him for who he is instead of who they think he should be - it doesn’t change the fact that his experiences can often mirror our own.
Bless this post. See, this is why I love this fandom sometimes, because I love the different interpretations of the characters. This post is so, so true. I use to see it all the time at a young age. My friend’s niece and nephew, for example. If her niece fell she was cuddled, babied, held, and told that it would be o.k. If her nephew fell it was, “Don’t you cry. You’re a boy. Boy’s don’t cry.”
I think people forget that there are expectations of men. You see a post about women’s rights and feminism and support it, and that’s great, but you see a post about a man echoing the same message and it’s a whole nother story. There’s also the fact that all it takes is one man to screw it up for everyone. You see a post on tumblr with some douche talking about how “she was asking for it” because of what she wore and you think, “ugh all men are jerks.” Then suddenly you see this panic from the sensible men out there like, “Shit, no no no that’s not all of us!” I think I realized this when I started taking Women’s Studies. My dad was terrified. He thought I was suddenly going to hate him, that it was going to teach me that men are terrible. I was like, “Dad I love you that would never happen,” but the sad fact is that I did see some girls in there who did misinterpret the message of, “equality for ALL.” And don’t get me started on the things people thought when they’d see a man in a Women’s Studies class. "I hope you’re not here to pick up chicks,“ and just… yeah.
I was in a class once and there was this article we read that I felt was really pushing it as far as gender rolls go. You know what I mean. You know you do. Those articles where someone is really, really trying to make something into a gender issue when…. it’s really not. One of those "why does the little boy get to speak up first on Sesame Street” when you’re thinking to yourself “it’s a kid’s show and he spoke up first because he had something to say if you keep watching you’ll see that the little girl talks the most.” There was a guy in class who pointed that out and this girl just flipped out on him. And this poor guy just sat there, horrified, because he was just speaking his honest feelings. He didn’t say anything terrible or demeaning, but suddenly he was attacking her rights somehow.
So yeah, just… Kanji echoes that pretty well. In some cases men ARE so much better. This response in regards to anime I feel like is true too. I’ve seen guys at GameStop who aren’t too willing to admit the games they play or don’t care for (all guys like Call of Duty right?) or if we talk about anime they don’t want to admit to liking something like Madoka Magica (even if its twisted as fuck) or how a certain pokemon is really cute.