A friend of mine posted this quote she found online and why it irritates her so much.  The quote was this:

“I am sad for Michael Brown’s family but I am also sad for Darren Wilson’s family because they have to go into witness protection. There is no respect for our law enforcement. ”

The reason why quotes like this irritate us so much isn’t because we’re heartless, or “not thinking about the family.”  It’s because no one ever thinks about the victim’s family.  What about Michael Brown’s family? Darren Wilson’s family gets sympathy.  Not only that, but they get to see reports that praise Darren Wilson, that go into how he’s never done anything like this before, that he’s a good man.  Meanwhile, you know what Michael Brown’s family gets to see?  

They get to see people trying their hardest to paint him as a thief.  

They get to see people trying to justifying his shooting.  

They, and others on their side, have to fight to show that, hey, this kid did nothing wrong, at all.  They have to analyze the reports and point out inconsistencies.  They have to protest and get hit with tear gas.  They have to rely on social media and hope it spreads around enough.  They have to hope for a news crew to report the truth then, when the news shows up, they say things like, “Darren Wilson was a hard working man.”

And, most importantly, they are the ones who have to deal with not having this young man around anymore.  He’s not going to come home anymore.  He’s not going to be there.  He’s gone.  And instead of grieving and having time to deal with their loss, they get to look at these lies pop up because, “Surely there had to be a reason, Darren Wilson would never do something like that.”  

And I can understand denial, I don’t like to admit unpleasant things about people I know, either.  But when you have all of that evidence in front of you, you accept it, you don’t go, “Well he was a suspect in a robbery so…” And you sure as hell don’t attack an entire town for speaking their opinion about it.  "You think we’re wrong?  Here, have some tear gas. Let’s march the streets like we’re in a war zone.“

This isn’t the first time this has happened, this whole "blaming the victim” mentality that our society has.  Our society always have to have a reason for something.  "A happened because of B.“  

"She was raped?  Well, was she drunk?  What was she wearing?

"He was shot?  Well, what did he do?  Did he steal something?  Did he run from the police?  Was he a suspect in something?”

Our society can’t handle the fact that there is either a) no reason whatsoever for bad behavior or b) the reason is unpleasant: racism, sexism, homophobia, things of that nature.  And you know who suffers most from that?  The victim, and the victim’s family.  Because while people are sitting here trying to place blame on the victim, they’re tarnishing his memory, and hurting his family.