And Lonnie thought coming out had been difficult.

Though, to be fair, she hadn’t done that on her own terms. Having such a large family meant that it was damn near impossible to keep any secrets. One of her cousins had told another cousin who told the third one, who then proceeded to spread the word to the fourth one and the fourth one’s much chattier sister, who then blurted it out during one of Penny Knox’s patented Sunday dinners.

By then, the story had morphed into an otherworldly being where Lonnie had gone from holding a girl’s hand on the way to school to having a full-blown make-out session in the locker room of her eighth-grade gym class. A mortified Lonnie had no choice but to tell the true story and reveal her feelings for the cute girl in her class, and she swore that no junior high make-out session had happened. She should’ve ratted out her pimple-faced cousin, who she’d seen kissing a boy – tongue and all – but Lonnie had been too busy worrying about her Grand-Penny’s reaction to her liking girls that way. She’d expected some tears and some, “Where did I go wrong in raising you,” but, to her surprise, her grandmother told her cousin off for sticking her nose in other people’s business.

“And I know damn well yo’ fast ass be out there with them little boys,” which had proven that Penny Knox was, in fact, a mutant fresh out of Xavier’s School of the Gifted – a reference Lonnie held dear because her crush had a thing for Storm.

Sometimes we come out of the closet.

Sometimes, there was never a closet to begin with.

And other times… we get an unwanted push.

Don’t be like Lonnie’s cousins.

You can find more information about my book via the website or the Facebook page <3 Take care, magical ones!

Had a great time at ACEN but the best part was definitely having my mom and nephew there. My mom is always cheering me on in this whole venture but she’s never seen me at work in person. To have her and my nephew sitting there and saying they’re proud of me just made my whole con.

Sometimes, I wonder if I can make this crazy venture work: writing books, doing crafts, promoting our cosplay and ourselves, I wonder how in the hell am I going to do this. But having them there smiling and cheering me on reminded me that I can absolutely do this.

So, with that said, thanks for a great ACEN and see you at Momocon!!!

(also thanks to the Bane cosplayer for taking a pic with my mama)

So I was 13 and watching the Mortal Kombat cartoon (Mortal Kombat: Defenders of the Realm, look it up, it’s amazingly terrible) when our phone rang. Back then I was living with my dad and my step-mom, but I’d see my mom every weekend. She called our house and asked to talk to my dad. I thought it was kinda weird because she’d usually talk to me for longer than a, “Hi, where’s your dad,” but cartoons man, so I shrugged it off and told my dad to pick up the phone. 

Anyhow, I was sitting and watching the last episode, Liu Kang and the others were trying to beat Shao Kahn, all that hero stuff. My dad called me to come downstairs and I remember being kinda irritated, because it was the season finale and I was Mortal Kombat obsessed and needed to know what happened. My step-mom told him to come upstairs instead and they came into my room. 

Again, odd, to have both parentals in my room for no reason. It was Saturday morning so sitting in bed watching cartoons was the norm, so there was no real need for them to come in like that. Still, I shrugged it off, and kept trying to watch the episode past my dad’s shoulder when he sat in front of me, my step-mom sitting behind me. 

The extra odd part was that my dad looked like he was about to cry. I hadn’t connected the dots yet, I just kind of made note of it and proceeded to try and catch the last two minutes of the show. 

Then he told me that my big brother was in a car accident.

And I remember actually kind of shrugging that off, too, because my brother was my hero, you know? He was big and strong and he probably just had a light scratch or something, and we probably had to go pick him up from the hospital since my mom doesn’t drive. No big deal, no need for tears, no need to interrupt my Mortal Kombat finale.

But no.

No hospital.

It’s been 18 years today since my brother died, and even if it was so long ago I sometimes feel like it just happened yesterday, and sometimes feel like, man, I should be able to just pick up the phone and call him and tell him about all the cool stuff I’m doing. I wonder what he’d think of the books and the cosplay and all that stuff, and get kinda sad because I know he’d be proud of his geeky little sister and probably threaten to beat up any of the haters I get even if I’m an adult, lol, but that’s what big brothers do, especially brothers named Glenn Berry  :)

My absolute favorite pics from Anime Central this year!

So if you’ve been on my page for a while you know that I lost my older brother when I was 13. You also know that I do have a nephew. What I realized during Anime Central was that I actually haven’t seen him since back in college, so around 8, maybe even 10 years ago. So when he showed up at ACEN I was thrilled to see him 

I pretty much took him around the artist alley and introduced him to all of my friends like a loser, lol. He got to see what it is that I do and he, most importantly, finally got to meet my wifey and gave her a big hug. 

So was Anime Central the best con I’ve been to this year? Yeeeeah, probably, because I got to see my nephew again Though I probably embarrassed him by being all, “OMG THIS IS MY NEPHEW YOU GUYS HE’S HERE!!!” ^^;;;

Well that was rather… interesting?

I just woke up from a kind of strange, but somewhat meaningful dream. I was watching someone play Super Mario Galaxy. I think it was a new one, like part three, because it wasn’t a stage I recognized at all. But anyway, I heard my mom call me to come downstairs because it was time to go. I don’t know where I was supposed to be going, I still don’t, but I went downstairs.

And she was standing there with my brother.

Now, a few things before I continue.

1. I have only dreamt about my brother since he passed away two other times. I only remember one of those times but I remember that it was twice (though I guess in that sense it could’ve been more than two, but I only remember one). That one dream I remember was him actually saying, “You should tell her,” in regards to me and my partner. So he actually told me to tell my mom about my partner. We were in my mom’s old apartment, I knew that he was supposed to be dead, and that was pretty much all he said to me.

2. Every time I dream about him, the ages aren’t right. He passed away when I was 13, but I’m never 13 in the dream, I’m whatever age I am at the time. Which is how I know he’s supposed to be dead. He’s still 26, no matter what, because that was how old he was when he died. 

Which makes the dream I just woke up from really, really bizarre, because I’m 30 now. He should be older, right? But nope, 26. I’m still smaller than him in height so it feels like I’m 13? 

Anyhow, my mom is standing there with my brother and all of my stuff is packed. Like everything. Not just clothes, but absolutely everything. And apparently, I’m supposed to spend the day with my brother. I asked him if anyone else is going with us, and he shakes his head and says that it’s just for us. 

So I go outside with my bags and it’s raining like crazy. But I stand and wait for him to pull the car up so we can pack it up and go. For some reason I don’t ask why he packed all my stuff or anything, I’m just happy to go somewhere with him because it was always fun. 

So he pulls up and I’m waiting for him to get out the car and help me pack it up with my stuff. But he doesn’t get out. He just sits there in the driver’s seat, looks at me, smiles and shakes his head before he starts to pull away.

Then I wake up.

And this really kind of startled me because… he died in a car accident. So in this dream he packed away all my things, left me with all of them, and drove off in his car. 

Which… what?

O.K. so I had a bit of time to mull it over (aka lay in bed and stare at the ceiling like “what the hell was that?!”) But finally, I think I figured it out. One thing that gets me, on occasion, is when something good happens or if I’m making crafts and writing or just… anything, really, I have this moment of, “I wish he was here to see all of this.” Like this whole crafting/cosplay/writing thing wasn’t going on when I was 13 (the writing was, and watching anime, so I guess it was… sort of building up?) 

This week I found out that two things I submitted are getting published. And I have tried submitting to Dreamspinner before, several times actually, and last year one short story finally made it into an anthology. So you can imagine my surprise that the first two things I sent in for this year just… made it. Just like that. 

And suddenly this dream happens.

This dream where he packs all of my stuff, which means… he got to see all of it. Clothes, coasters, clocks, figures, video games, just… everything (and there weren’t that many suitcases yet somehow when I went downstairs to meet him and my mom, the living room was empty, and our living room is where I craft and write and everything). And I’m 30 in the dream so he got to see me as a 30 year old woman who is working to make all of this work. When he died I was 13. I was 13 for 2 months before he died. So I was still very much his little sister. I mean I still am but… I was actually older than him in the dream, which means… I grew up.

The first dream I remember having about him I was still younger than him. I was in my twenties. Very early twenties but still. So he still had to come and tell me to do something, like, “You should tell her,” about coming out to my mom. This time, he just… smiled at me and left. 

So… yeah, that was… interesting.

It’s not a bad dream at all, it just… it throws me off when he shows up in dreams because it rarely happens. It was a good dream, overall, just… seeing him leave in the end kinda sucked for the simple fact that I’ll always miss him. But… I think I get what the whole thing meant, anyway.

Just… next time, it should definitely not be before 6 a.m. Then again my brother use to work the night shift so I guess 6 a.m. is nothing to him.

Wow!  Look at what my dad in law made for us!  It might not seem like much but I always remember how, once upon a time, I wasn’t really accepted in the family.  Now he’s making us stuff for our book and super supportive about everything we do  :)  

I don’t remember how many years I played “the roommate,” and I know I mention this a lot when we have family gathering time and how it’s so great that those days are over, but it’s a really big deal to me and it means the world knowing that I have a family within my partner’s family  :) 

That moment when your mothers hang out with you for a girl’s night out and you realize how close your family really is now  <3

slowmovingpanic:

Shout out to all the closeted LGBT people who have to return to unsafe family environments this season. Remember that there is nothing wrong with you and that no, you are not a hypocrite for loving the people who raised you despite the things they have done to hurt you. Above all remember that you will always have friends who support you even if your family does not.

To my followers who need it, my inbox is open  :)

nerd-in-the-tardis:

captainorangeaddict:

falling-in-love-with-fandoms:

#GRANNY FOR THE WIN

instagranph : Our costumes for the Halloween carnival at the kids’ preschool yesterday. But 10/31 will be frighteningly different..! @DavidBurtka came up with both themes/costumes. He’s amazing.

Bless this family.  Seriously.