Conversation I had yesterday with a sound company rep:
Me: Hi, I’m with *** Church and we’re looking at revamping our sound system, so we were hoping you might be able to come out and do an assessment of our equipment.
Sound Co Rep: Sure, we can do that. Is there someone who knows the system, that can be there to show me everything and I can work with?
Me: Yes, I am the Head of Sound and will be the person to accompany you around the church.
Sound Co Rep: Oh. Well, I’d really like someone who actually knows the sound system very well.
Me: Again, that person is me. I am the main person who runs sound and again I head up the sound ministry at the church.
Sound Co Rep: To be honest, I’d much rather have a man go thru everything with me since they would know it better.
Me: …
**It takes quite a bit to ruffle my feathers, so to speak. But, that man made me SO angry. *sighs* Yes, my voice is high and many people mistake me for a 5 year old on the phone. However, that does not discount my many years of experience running sound. Yet, because I’m a woman, I’m not qualified in his eyes, to consult with him regarding my sound system at work. Wow. Just, wow.
What the fucking hell really? It’s a fucking CHURCH are you seriously going to discriminate in church? I’m not super religious by any means, but I have a feeling that the higher powers that be aren’t cool with sexism, just… wow. WOW! And he flat out said he’d rather have a man there?!
You should’ve been like, “There is a man here. He’s our Lord and Savior. And he doesn’t condone your simple minded behavior.” Just… OMG IT’S CHURCH WHUT?! I guess sexism really does happen everywhere, Jesus Christ. LITERALLY!
Bigger is Better & this is why!
This deserves thousands of notes.
Stop reblogging girls in bikinis and check this out NOW, you wont regret it.
Omg. They’re all so flawless, but Demi Lovato is #1 in my book :) I fricken love this <#
OMG. #4 is so much prettier with some meat on her bones.
I’m so happy everyone’s idea of Beautiful has changed.
Things that I’m happy to wake up to. Can we do a cosplay version of this of gorgeous plus sized cosplayers?
"A woman can preach. A woman can work. A woman can fight. A woman can build, can rule, can conquer, can destroy just as much as a man can."
Ladies of Attack on Titan.
Not gonna lie I want that to be me like I want my hair to do that and I wanna wear stuff like this why can’t I be stylish?
LOL OH MY GOD THE LAST ONE.
HOW HE JUST SHAKES HIS HEAD TERRIFIED LIKE NO NO NO NEVER.
This is seriously my new favorite youtuber I can’t stop watching his videos.
Watch till the very last part. It’s worth it.
wasn’t going to reblog it untiL THE ENDING
Okay, I’ll admit, I have gained some respect for this guy.
i was unsure about this until the end a+
True story. Back when I worked at GameStop, before I hit assistant manager, the previous assistant manager said the last one to me because, and I quote, “I’m also a medic, I deal with women all the time so I know.” (let’s not get into how a medic for the army somehow has time to work at a video game store that’s not the moral of this story).
The woman he was ringing up almost jumped over the counter and bashed his face in. The way she said to him, “Oh no, you have NO IDEA WHAT IT’S LIKE,” is still something I remember to this day, and it’s been several years since this happened.
fatality
J
Wow lots of reblogs this morning. But this, this this this. This. This is why it’s hard being a cosplaying geeky black girl, because this is the expectation. Right here. I once had a customer tell me to my face when I worked at GameStop, “I just assumed a woman like you wouldn’t have time for games.” Woman like me? You don’t even know me, sir, we’ve talked for thirty seconds, and that entire time was spent with you asking me, “Do you even play games?” You think because I’m a black woman that I don’t know what a PS3 is? Oh wait, you assume I know because of the children I obviously have, or the boyfriend, right? (I’ve gotten this one a lot, too).
Even with the book coming out, I’ve been asked what it’s about and when I go, “It’s an urban supernatural murder mystery where animals come to life,” I get weird looks. No guys, it’s not one of those “angry black woman” stories. I’m not writing about how someone “did me wrong” because, honestly, I’ve never really experienced that to the point of wanting to add to the literature about it. Has someone done me wrong in my lifetime? Hell yeah. But you know what my muses want to write about? Birds coming to life. Because that’s just who I am. I’m weird and geeky and would rather write about an extinct species of animal turning into a hot guy than how my ex-boyfriend stopped talking to me because I wouldn’t sleep with him.
And before you ask, no, the murder scenes are not symbolism to some repressed memory of someone treating me like crap and me taking out my aggression on them.
It’s a double-edged sword, really. If I don’t write about it then I’m weird because, clearly, all black women are “angry.” However, if I do write about it it’s, “Ugh just another angry black woman.” And that’s not just from the white perspective, but from the black perspective too. My mom, my own mom, flat out told me, “I get so tired of those stories, I’m glad you’re writing something different.” Now am I saying that there aren’t reasons for black women to be “angry?” No, of course not, because there are – trust me, this post proves it. Just don’t assume that every black woman you see is holding a grudge against someone and is going to set their car on fire.
Honestly? All PEOPLE have reason to be angry, not just us. But that’s the stereotype established. It’s a blessing and a curse, I guess. Don’t mess with us, yes, sure, that’s fine. But at the same time don’t assume that I’m here to rip your head off, because I’m not. Just like we won’t assume that all white men are out to get us. Not all white men follow that stereotype of being on top of the world and being assholes. And you’ve all seen those posts on tumblr, of the white guy posting about how he’s been discriminated against or hurt or pushed around and the responses of, “Oh cry me a river white boy you know nothing about pain.” Guess what? Pain and hurt don’t discriminate. It could give a flying fuck about what color you are or what gender you are. Anyone can be hurt, can be angry, can be whatever emotion they want, so just stop this nonsense already.
Dove hired a forensic artist to draw how women see themselves versus how others see them - the results are moving.
Brb crying
Love thyself
I had a strange, very strong reaction to this, because if it were left up to me, who knows how I would describe myself. Real tears. This was a powerful reminder coming from, for me, an unexpected source.
All of the feels.
Fucking Dove *cries*
Seriously though, I can completely relate to this, especially as a cosplayer. The point is to look like the character, but 9 times out of 10 I won’t for a variety of reasons: skin color, weight, ect. So I get worried about posting pictures sometimes. Even if it is a character that I have the “right” features for (Princess Tiana) it’s like, “God but there’s so many pretty, skinny cosplayers who do her so well!” Thank GOODNESS for places like tumblr, with fat positive/race positive cosplay groups, and awesome followers :)
The new hair is also, randomly, making me more confident too ^^
All. Of. This. Especially the 2nd one, the 3rd one, the 5th one, and the 6th one. This is because:
a) I guess black girls don’t look lesbian enough, unless if they’re super butch? Oh we also don’t look like geeks either. Even though I worked at GameStop and wore fucking companion cubes in my ears
b) I’ve never been intimate with a guy. I’ve messed around with them and had a boyfriend in high school, but we never went all the way. So then I got the question, “How do you know? You haven’t been with a guy.”
c) I double majored in English and Women’s Studies. That’s Women’s Studies part triggered some red flags. Clearly, Women’s Studies would make me hate all men.
d) It’s just a phase.
Here’s the truth:
a) NOT ALL LESBIANS WILL HAVE SHORT HAIR AND WEAR FLANNEL! NOT ALL LESBIANS WILL DRESS IN WHAT YOU CONSIDER TO BE MASCULINE CLOTHING! Some do, yes, but not all of them. There is no “lesbian” look. In the same breath, NOT ALL GAY MEN WILL BE FLAMBOYANT! Some will, yes, but not all! Here’s a secret: most gay/lesbian people? Look. Like. Everyone. Else. GASP! I KNOW, RIGHT?! This go for geeks. NOT ALL GEEKS ARE GOING TO LIVE IN THEIR MOTHER’S BASEMENT, BE OVERWEIGHT, BE AWKWARD, and all that’s in between. Some are, yes, but not all. (my upcoming short story for Dreamspinner actually touches on this, as it has a black, attractive geek, and the lead character is surprised by it).
b) JUST BECAUSE A WOMAN ISN’T WITH A MAN DOESN’T MEAN SHE NEEDS TO BE WITH ONE TO FIGURE OUT IF SHE’S A LESBIAN! Guess what? Sometimes, women just know that they’re attracted to other women. Or, in my case, they fall in love with another woman. Same with men. WHY DOESN’T ANYONE ASK STRAIGHT WOMEN, “Dur you’ve never been with a woman how do you know you’re not a lesbian?” Because they just know, right? Well, so do we.
c) WOMEN’S STUDIES DOES NOT MAKE YOU HATE MEN! It makes you want everyone to be equal, it makes you want everyone to have a voice, regardless of gender, sexual preference, race, and all that’s in between. It makes you aware of the issues in our society that you might not have been aware of unless you were a victim of them. Or, in my case, you know about the racial issues because you’re black, but you never think about the gender issues because NO ONE addressed them to me. Sure, I got the, “Dur girls don’t play video games,” but that’s about it, honestly. Now, black issues? Yeah that’s been talked about since high school. I knew about the struggles of my race, but not about my gender. I also knew such things because of my family talking to me. The ONLY women talk was that, “Let’s separate the boys and girls and talk about menstruation ”
And you know what? Women’s Studies went beyond just women’s issues. It was more “cultural/social issues” and not just “women.” In a way, Women’s Studies made me appreciate men more. It made me appreciate the good men I had in my life. I have an awesome, AWESOME dad, who took great care of me. And it wasn’t for some tragic “something happened to my mom” reason. Women’s Studies made me see that, you know, we talk a lot about the terrible men, but never seem to appreciate the good. Or, if they are good, we assume there’s a reason behind it, or it’s a lie. I would talk about how I grew up with my dad and some people would assume he was FORCED into it, like, “Something happened to your mom, right?” No, actually. Instead of having my mom struggle to raise me in her apartment in Chicago, I moved in with my dad who was getting remarried and getting a house. That man would take me to see my mom every weekend since I was 9 years old. He would go pick her up to go see my school functions if she couldn’t get a ride to them since she didn’t drive. And my parents always, always told their new significant others that I came first. That if they couldn’t understand that my father was taking me to see my mother and seeing her on a weekly basis, too bad. Hell, my dad took care of my older brother, and he wasn’t even his son. But you know what? In my brother’s obituary my dad is named his father. His father ran off on my mom shortly after he was born. She was 16. When my dad met my mom, he helped with my brother, so much so that I thought we had the same dad until I was 10.
SO I DON’T HATE MEN! How can I when I had such a great influence in my dad? And my brother? There is no hatred here, so STOP THINKING THAT!
d) FUCK YOU IT’S BEEN 11 YEARS IT’S NOT A GODDAMN PHASE!
Say it now, with meaning
She wishes that she were one of those people who could say things
With meaning
She wishes that the words she spoke would touch someone, would brighten someone’s day
So she sits down and thinks of ways to construct her words
She crafts them together, like crayons to papers working with scissors and glue
The letters are put together to form the words she wishes to speak
With meaning
She opens her mouth and-
Too emotional
She frowns at the comment and tries to speak again-
Too angry
Her face falls along with the words, bits of glue and paper that hit the floor
Too something, too everything
So she remains silent, and her sad silence creates meaning, creates reasons for others to pick up her crayons and paper
But she still wishes, always wishes, that she could’ve been one of those people who could say things
With meaning
***
Notes: A little random writing in the morning before work, inspired by talking about Women’s Studies with bobitincandyland Because sometimes, we want to say things, and get discouraged. And it’s great that others are saying things, but it doesn’t stop us from wishing that we could speak the words they can.
This isn’t mean to be sad, not really, we were just talking about Women’s Studies briefly and I remember being in college, taking classes, and there were two women in one of my classes who were my mother’s age, taking the class because they finally could. They couldn’t speak up back then, and even if they can now, they wish they could’ve back then.
Who wants morning writings? :) Once upon a time I majored in Women’s Studies along with Creative Writing ^^
Random: Writing blog almost has 50 followers, yay! Head on over for more writings like this and fandom writings!
